One Hundred Days of Blessing

We are rejoicing and celebrating our 100 days together! It is a great thing to remember how far we have come and to look back closely at the days when Sweetpea was so new to us and to see such progress. It is a great thing indeed.

There is a Chinese tradition that we follow in our family called the 100 Day Celebration. When a child is born in China, traditionally, the first 100 days the child is held in seclusion in order to protect it's health and give it the best chance at a fighting start. Also for those days it is not given it's formal name, it might be called a nickname or crib name but the name it will carry with them into adulthood will not be pronounced upon it until it reaches the maturity of these 100 days. When the child has reached the 100th day the family prepares a celebration and invites family and friends to come and meet the child giving the visitors red eggs and candy. A feast is usually prepared and during this feast the patriarch usually welcomes the child into the family and pronounces declares the name of the child.

In our family tradition we give this a twist and celebrate the 100th day from when the child comes into our family. It is a time to recall the goodness of God's faithfulness and to see how the days have gone. It is a rich tradition for us. Each of our daughters have celebrated their 100 Days and have great memories and pictures from it. Now Sweetpea will also have this wonderful treasure to tuck into her memory bank and know that she is forever part and parcel of this family, you can see our family taking shape right before your eyes. It is a time to lay aside the moment of striving and thank God for what He has already done.

We are truly grateful, humbled and filled with awe at how God has moved in our lives, all of our lives. We are, none of us, the same for having loved Sweetpea. She is being transformed before our eyes and we can take no credit.

Happy Birthday Little Brother......

We want to wish my littlest bro the best birthday today, especially because he is an avid blog follower....... here's looking you in the eye (standing on a step stool, I know!).

I just remember when you were this small and cute. How I got to hold you and dress you and feed you. You were my very favorite baby doll. I love you bro, happy day!

Going Above and Beyond

This week has been a trial to my heart. Sadly it is due to the realization that I have let things slip and that has created problems in Sweetpea's transition to our family. Generally there is the time of long illnesses that has been endured that has swayed me from my diligence but since regaining our footing I have been lax in getting back to the basics with her.

In honesty it is selfishness that causes me to not pick up on the daily therapy and get back into the routine. There was also a little denial that she had held it together so well with all the hospitalizations of the different ones of us that she was doing okay....... perhaps.... maybe......... not so bad.....

There has come a reversal in her demeanor recently. A going back to the familiar and known behavior for her that had diminished greatly almost to my hope of extinction----even though I know that it is entirely too early for that type of progress.

The intimacy that we had created doing therapy daily, several times a day, had allowed her space to change and explore a new life that she had never experienced before, and she was blossoming. Yet the selfish part of me cries over the cost of tending this precious orchid, a bloom I am slowly coming to understand but have little to go on. I wish that she was fully transplanted already and blooming hale and hearty so that I could step back into a more casual role of parenting.

Today, loud and clear, I got the message that there are no shortcuts to this transplant process. It will take toil, labor, sweat, tears, pain and self-sacrifice. (Those are terms I generally try to avoid in my comfortable life.) I may not like the cost but I will keep my eyes on the prize and be steadfast. We both went back to step one today and while there was resistance from both sides I know that we will regain the ground that was lost and continue forward.

I am sadly a product of this instant gratification, microwave society. I guess this is one way to nullify it's footprint on my life. The other would be to live as a hermit in a mountain cave with no modern convenience and I am WAAAAAY too social to do that!

Another Threshold Crossed

Today a minor but important-to-this-mama threshold was crossed. First, a back story to get some details.

When we were in the agonizing wait for Sweetpea to come we became more and more disillusioned with the parents from the first family. They were not exactly stellar with following through with what they said and they were prone to change their minds at a whim. This did give us a great opportunity to trust God more for the whole arrangement.

When all was said and done and Sweetpea was on the plane heading to us there was a slight little hiccup with her ticket- it was a round trip ticket instead of a one way. They also had given themselves a lot of buffer before the return trip and booked it for Valentines Day. This made me nervous only because I felt I couldn't trust them and that they had a little yoyo string tied to her.

Now that that date has come and gone I find myself relieved that one less thing can easily pull her from our arms. They still have the legal ability to do so, but now they would have put forth more financially, something they are not willing to do. I am glad the yoyo string is cut and the ticket is null and void. So I will sip a cuppa tea and celebrate another threshold crossed even if I am the only one counting it.

It's all Good

We have wonderful news to report...........no one is ill in our house!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey that is praiseworthy around here. This past week the pallor of illness lifted from my Beloved's face and he is regaining his vigor daily. Now, he is humbled by what vigor is defined by these days but at least he is on his feet and heading for a full recovery.

It has been a time of great reflection for me. As we have gone through this extended time of illness I have felt like the phrase keeps bouncing around me head "this is not a real crisis, if this had been a real crisis the emergency signal in your area would have alerted you to stand by for further instructions". Perhaps it was delirium brought on by too little sleep or just an old PSA announcement that got weirdly lodged in my head but somehow I felt comforted by it. I was glad that what we were experiencing was not as all consuming as it appeared to be at moments from the inside. I was glad that we would all get through this unscathed and slightly wiser. I was profoundly grateful that this was NOT the crisis that I should be consumed by and fret over, that in the end God had it all worked out for His glory.

There was another theme that ran throughout the course of this time frame and it came from a much healthier source and that was:

The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms. Duet.
33:27

When I first ran across that passage in my devotions I thought it was a very old fashioned verse one that I had not heard for a long time. I did not think much that it applied to me. Yet, it kept repeating itself over and over during the course of these weeks that have turned into months. I now take great comfort in this old fashioned verse. I have found rest in those everlasting arms that held me and mine. I have found security and strength in those arms. I am forever grateful that I was upheld during this time, that I got to float when my normal tendency is to fret, and I got to witness the faithfulness of God for myself and my family time and time and time and time and time and time and time and time and time and time and time again.

God is sooooooooooooo good. I am so grateful. I could sing of His love forever!

Gong Xi Fa Xai to you and your family!

Happy Chinese New Year.

It is the end of the festival for Chinese New Year and today is Lantern Festival, one of my favorite memories from China. We celebrated with a picnic lunch and read aloud of a favorite Chinese novel. The kids were given hong bao, the red envelopes by their Baba and did their crazy happy dance. Their piggy banks are enriched on this day each year.

Coming Along

We are ever so slowly getting back on track after this long winter of illness. Finding that daily we are chipping away at what feels like an avalanche of stuff that had been shoved aside by the urgent and life sustaining demands during the last month. I cannot yet look at the whole mountain of stuff because it would send my head spinning into utter despair but each day taking on a little corner of untidiness that is a reminder of what we have passed through will get it done before long.

I am feeling pretty much back to normal. I still have a lingering cough and my energy is not yet fully back but I am functional. I am trying to pull us back into a normal routine so that the kids will benefit from regular school hours and routine. It also gives me a small sense of accomplishment, that if nothing else has been accomplished for the day at least the educational part has been covered.

The kids are all back to their bouncy selves. I marvelled at how well Sweetpea did with the whole hospital experience. I wondered as we went through it if it wasn't a little insulated capsule of bonding that we got to experience to speed our way through to a better place relationally. One story in the hospital is endearing to me. When we woke in the early morning she was really thirsty and I gave her small sips of drink. I asked her if she would like a popsicle as she was allowed to have them. She said no she did not want a popsicle as it was before breakfast. I asked her who made that rule as I had never made such a silly rule and certainly if I was offering her a popsicle it was not against my rule (at least for this one day, all others would be exempt of course). She just could not hurdle over this "rule" in her head that there were to be no popsicles before breakfast. As I knew that she was not going to get "breakfast" as she knew it I really wanted to get something into her. It became almost a battle of wills over this popsicle thing. I got the popsicle and opened it. Sliding into the bed beside her I told her that she could either "eat it or wear it" and began to apply it like lipstick upon her lips. She could not resist long before her grins turned to giggles and her giggles turned to licks. Soon the popsicle was no more and her lips were bright red. She still was in shock that I, her mother, had forced her to eat a popsicle before breakfast. I had broken a cardinal rule. She was sure that I would be in trouble somehow, but she was innocent even if she bore the evidence of guilt on her face. It was one of those special moments with your kids when an inside story is forged and made even sillier by the keeping and telling of it. It has been a special thing between us.

Bringing them all HOME SWEET HOME

I am in really high spirits tonight as I was able to bring all of my family home today.

Sweetpea rallied very well this morning and by noon the doctors checked her over and gave us walking papers to get out of Dodge. It looked at that moment that my Beloved would still have another test scheduled for the afternoon so we did not think there was any hope that he would be discharged today. Just as I began to make arrangements to get the two of us picked up and taken home his doctor walked in and wanted to discuss things with him.

They nicely agreed to relocate their discussion to our room and I was able to be part of the team. It made a difference when I heard that he was cancelling the afternoon test and wanted him to stay another day to get more antibiotics and rest. I asked if perhaps he could do those two things at home just as well as in the hospital if there was not further testing he wanted to do. This doctor was so kind and agreed that he would discharge my Beloved so we could all go home together!!!!!

We were a merry band of leavers. The father and the daughter in their wheelchairs waving farewell to all the good people of hospital land. We thank you and we wish you well but we do not wish to see you again for a very looooong time to come.

SuperV brought our car with our other kiddos in it and as we loaded she hopped out and into BeautifulB's car for a ride home so we could go directly home and put these sick people back into their own comfy beds. It was cause for celebration.

As soon as I had Sweetpea bathed and sleeping sweetly in her own bed my body cascaded with exhaustion. I did not realize that I had been running on so much adrenaline until it stopped and I felt so very tired. I am so happy to be in my own bed tonight with all of my own under one roof. For this I praise God who has kept us through all these days and his faithfulness cannot be measured.

Sweetpea goes into the hospital

Sweetpea is now also admitted to the hospital. She is in the pediatric unit but it is on the same floor as her Baba and he is able to shuffle over and visit with us. Today did not go as planned and she went from being a little sick to being really sick very quickly. I was so glad that I was not alone when it happened and that there were others around to help pray and reason with me as I had to make the decision of what to do and how to help her.

We had gone to church this morning and I knew that she was running a temp. As she doesn't go to children's church and she doesn't have much contact with other people I felt it was okay to do so. She drank some water and slept on me during service but I noticed that she was getting really hot by the end. I took her out to get some water and to be able to talk to her. As service let out and I waited for the other kids to come to where we were I held her in my lap. Sweetpea was turning the most strange color of purple I have ever seen. Then suddenly she threw up all over herself and me. Kindly some people were able to get towels to help clean us off. She felt a little better after that and I planned to go home and wash us up and put her to bed.

I asked SuperV to drive us home as other friends had taken the rest of the tribe off for playdates and happier times. As we drove down the road Sweetpea started moaning pitifully and told us she was going to hurl again. I was able to get her out of the car and to a clear place before she profusely did what she needed to do. Poor girl was limp in my arms. This happened several times and the last time we stopped (as we had already determined that the ER was the place to go and not home) SuperV found a police officer and asked him for an escort. Well, that's where the story gets interesting and I was glad she was driving and not me because it became a high speed chase in reverse as we followed the police car pell-mell down the street blowing through red lights, turning corners seemingly on two wheels and screeching to a halt at the doors of the ER. I am sure it was more sedate than all of that but with my adrenaline pumping that was my take on it at the moment.

Sweetpea was taken into the ER and they did a really good job assessing her with all the complexities there are to take in. After a few hours she was still not responding as they expected and some of her blood work came back out of range so they issued us an invitation to stay with them overnight. OH JOY!

The other kiddos are tucked safely into bed at SuperV and MarvelM's house and are doing well. Sweetpea is sleeping a lot as her body has been through the ringer. I will be spending the night here by her side as they will be giving her more medicines and blood draws through the night. This is an excellent hospital and I am relieved that she is getting the best care possible.

One of the pastors from church stopped by this evening and brought a balloon. She saw it when she woke to go potty and when I tucked her back in bed it went to bed with her. So sweet.